It’s time for the sequel. Yes. We are back with another list of road-tripping people. Of course, in the first article, we talked about the driver and the passenger. As I wrote, these are the most patient people in the world. The front-seaters are definitely blessings, but, now, it’s time to talk about the back-seaters. Oh, the back seaters. They are not the most patient people you will ever meet. Far from it, actually. The back-seaters are far from blessings, but they have just as important roles.
The first back-seater I would like to talk about is the kid. Now, the kid doesn’t actually have to be a kid, but, most of the time, it is. The kid fulfills the very important role of conversation. The kid will talk about anything and everything that is passing by. One prime example of kid-conversation is, “Oh look! A cow! Look at him! Wow!” The kid loves to point out the obvious. “We’ve been stuck in traffic forever. Ugh.” Now, you have probably guessed already but the primary role of the kid is to ask the dreaded question. “Are we there yet?” or “When will we be there?” Oh man. I could not tell you how many times I’ve been on a road trip with a kid. And yes, they are important to the trip, but sometimes, you just want to tell the kid the shut up. (In my experience, it’s best if you tell them you want to play the Quiet Game. It usually works.) To all the kids out there, please stop asking how long it will be until we get there. Just subtract 5 minutes from what I told you last time.
There is one more all-important role that I must mention before I conclude the series -- The snack distributor. Sometimes, the snack distributor is also the passenger, but usually, the snack distributor is in the back seat. That way, they can reach the snacks. The snack distributor has a very important role in the car. Even though you’ve probably already guessed, I have to say it anyway. The snack distributor distributes the snacks. Yes, this is the person that gets everyone through the ride. The snack distributor knows what everyone wants. The kid, of course, gets the biggest snack. (It shuts them up for longer.) The passenger, who is often a mom, get something healthy (like some baby carrots or something). The driver gets something with easy access, due to the fact that they need to watch the road. And the snack distributor, gets whatever they want, whenever they want it. Speaking from experience, being the snack distributor is the best job on the road trip.
Of course, there are so many more roles that one can take on during a road trip. The sleeper, the spiller, and the cranky one to name a few, but the series has to come to an end at some point. I suppose that I could go on to make the third part, but then you would have to wait yet another week to hear my newest idea for a “types of people” list. And, of course, we can’t have you waiting that long, so, as sad as it may be, the series must come to an end. I have to say goodbye and farewell for this week.
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